I wonder if you need me still

HURT. The feeling Im trying to hide for months. Yes, I havent moved on. I didnt even try to. Why? Because Im still hoping although I know that there's no hope, that there's no chance.

I didnt know that if you love someone very much, if they left you, it will hurt also hurt much or even more. I am all by myself now, im independent. But because of all the problem im facing, of course I still need someone. Sometimes I just cant take the pain. My strength has limits that I just breakdown. I wanted to call him, coz at this time I badly need him, not as a friend, but more than that. Yes, I have loads of friends but you still need that special someone right?


I thought if i stop communicating with him I can move on, but hell no! Everyday I just miss him more. The more I miss him, the more it hurts. Sometimes Im walking home, Riding the bus, I would just cry coz I badly miss him. I want to be witrh him. I badly I want.


I saw his fb earlier and I never saw him that happy in his photos. Im happy because he already moved one. Im sad because he is  happy without me. I never thought I was so selfish. Maybe if he never knew me , he will not get hurt. I regret everything ive done. I feel terribly sad, hurt and all the bad feeling I could feel.

Too late to say sorry. Yeap, its too late to apologize. But its just me, I cant helped it. I tried to message him earlier. But I guess he will not reply again. and 5 days to go ...   :'(


I've been looking up to heaven while I'm crying over you. I cant forget the good times we've had when you were mine. I wonder if you need me still, after all this time....